The Centerpieces

Total cost: $30?...plus the cost of a cat eating her own food, and my auntie growing her own flowers

I had no idea that when I told my aunt that she was in charge of the flowers that she would become a florist-designing-fiend! True, it is her secret wish to be a florist, but really she has outdone herself. I was just thinking a few stems of flowers in her many vases on the tables, but she has taken the owl and pussycat theme and run with it. Check out her prototype below:

So, you know what that means helpers? There is going to be a origami folding party in your future! Perhaps, we can eat sushi for that party.

The Wedding "Party"

(So, it is a good thing that this whole "to-do" can be something to occupy and focus my brain; otherwise, I'd be bouncing off the walls, because I only have 8 more days with 8th graders...not that I don't love my students, but I need a summer break!)

I just finished reading a blog about the sticky wicket of selecting a wedding party. I really hope no one out there is offended, but Nathan and I opted not to pick one at all. Pretty much, if you are there with us, consider yourself part of the party. Why do people create this middle school situation for themselves? OMG! I wasn't picked! I guess I am not her BFF after all!

Beyond the legal fact of needing two witnesses, what is the purpose of an actual wedding party? Is it to get back at your "friend" who made you wear a poofy olive green dress at her wedding? Is it to belittle your cousin by not asking her to be the maid of honor? I don't get it, so I'm going to do a quick Google search for "history of wedding party".

***time elapses...about 5 seconds***

Well, this is what I found out. A wedding party is an ancient Anglo-Saxon tradition in which your "knights" would protect your bride from harm and insure that she made it safely to the wedding. And, the bridesmaid is basically, literally a maid who dressed the bride, etc. Seeing that there are no dragons about, and I can dress myself just fine, I don't believe we need a wedding party.

So, if you want to be more than the party of the wedding party and want to specifically help me slay some dragons, just let me know. I am accepting any and all help. BYOJL - Bring your own jousting lance.

The Dress

Total cost: Under $200 plus the time my mother will spend sewing it

WARNING! This is top secret. I'm not always traditional, but in this I am. The groom shall not gain knowledge of "the dress."

My mom told me she wanted to make my dress; I thought she was crazy. I do not like sewing. My hems turn out crooked. The thread always snags. I like to knit. Knitting can cover a multitude of sins, but if you mess up on the cut of a dress, it is obvious. Anyhow, she wanted to sew my wedding dress. I couldn't deny my mother her wish.

I like pretty things. I like shiny things. I like pretty shiny things. I was a farm girl with dirt on my knees, but with a dress over my head. I knew what I wanted: something simple, comfortable, and elegant. The pattern I chose is a Butterick pattern. Looks simple enough. It's flowy and comfortable, right?

Now, I've watched those TLC shows in which the bride is at that huge store, and she spends hours and hours selecting just one dress. It seems easy enough. Well, my mother and I spent two hours alone selecting fabric for this dress. Granted, we were at a store called "Fabric Depot" and as its name suggests, it was pretty much a warehouse of fabric, but still! How difficult can be choosing fabric?

Very difficult, if you like pretty shiny things. Two hours of difficult. I only hope the sewing of it is not as difficult. Good thing I'm not the one doing the sewing, because I would hate to take those two hours of hard decision-making and turn them into an uneven, lumpy, frazzled dress.

The Location

Total cost: $100

A few years ago after a fall excursion to the coast, Nathan and I took a side trip to an old growth trail attached to Clay Creek Campground. I didn't know at the time that it would be the location of our own fall wedding. Of course, I must admit that in a back corner of my mind, I did comment silently that leaves falling on the bridge to the trail would be a beautiful spot for a wedding photo.

Today, myself, Nathan, and our fearless wedding planners (my mother, my aunt and uncle) took the hour drive out to see the site, count parking spaces, picnic tables, and figure out how to have a classy wedding at a campground with no electricity. Despite the intermittent rain, I still found it to be a beautiful spot in which to be married. (Thank goodness.)

We have reserved the two picnic shelters that are adjoined by a baseball field (more of a meadow really) that I think would be a perfect spot for bocce ball, croquet, and badminton. The site has its own horseshoes courts. And, if it does rain, the picnic shelters have enormous stone fireplaces to keep us toasty while we toast and play Scrabble.

There is a sandy beach with bleacher style seating that seems to be the obvious spot for the ceremony. There is even a waterfall playing in the background which means of course, we'll have to speak up. Yet, the river will have less of a flow by the fall and may not be as raucous. I like that I get to make an entrance down a staircase...yes, I do like a bit of drama.

I am excited that all agree (even through the rain) that it will be a lovely spot.

The Invitations: Part 2, the Compilation

Total cost: $0

After the frustration of printing the invitation cards, I was worried the assembly would be just as much of a hassle, but no! I was wrong. I enlisted the help of two good friends, my mother, my aunt, and my soon-to-be mother-in-law. Quiche, muffins, and chai tea fueled us as we clipped, tied, and glued invitations together. They turned out just what I had envisioned, and despite a tragic tea spill, none were ruined or harmed in the process.

This is the outer design of the invitation. Nathan cleaned up a drawing by Edward Lear, and I used dafont.com to find some beautiful script to write lines from the poem, "The Owl and the Pussycat." I thought I was being original by selecting this poem with no relation to it other than it was a favorite of mine as a child, but it turns out that Nathan's "Granny" (great-grandmother) used to recite this poem when the grandchildren would come to visit. I am glad that it has a family tie as well.

 The innards of the design came into fruition from a trip to Michael's. They had a stack of scrap-booking paper in fall colors, and from there, my mother and I created this design: cardstock with the invitation information tied with a pretty copper ribbon to various fall-colored scrap-booking paper. The opposite side of the inside had an alternating color of cardstock glued in with RSVP information. I included postcards as the RSVP card from my aunt's and mine stash of vintage and art postcards. Some of mine included cards from my travels to museums from around Europe. When I was addressing them, I carefully selected cards for specific people (not all, but just a few) even though there were a few in the invitation-making crowd that thought I was a bit crazy. Yes, yes I am.




All in all, I am eternally grateful for everyone involved, because there was no way I could have done all of this on my own. I would have given up eventually and sent out an evite instead. Ha! Thank you Laura, Lara, Cheryl, Vie, and mama Jill.

The Invitations, Part 1: Printing

Total cost: $70 roughly including printer ink

Never, ever, never work with a computer late at night without any sort of calming influences or libations.The horror! The frustration! The alignment! I thought I would be clever and make my own invitations using my hp printer, but as I know, and as I should have remembered, computers are finicky creatures and oftentimes will simply behave badly just to get a rise out of you.

My invitations have four parts essentially (originally had three, but after a few choice words towards my Word document, I had to negotiate additional wording into its own spot): the card with the Edward Lear drawing of the Owl and the Pussycat plus quote from the poem, an insert with the actual "this is the time and place", another insert with RSVP information and what to wear, etc., and then an old/vintage postcard with the actual RSVP wording. It seemed easy enough. I started with the easiest part, the RSVP. Done. Then, the invitation insert. Done. Then, the card with the picture and quote and the RSVP information printed on the inside. Not so done. I kept aligning, fiddling with the margins, etc., but to no avail! The card prototypes kept coming out all wiggly. I tried another tactic. I created an additional insert for the RSVP information and forgot printing inside the card. Still, though the wiggles...

My best friend called me to check in on me since she is already married and had plenty of her own planning stress. I let out a string of sailor-worthy curse-words, and she responded, "I was joking about checking in on you. I didn't actually think you'd be freaked out." Well, that's computers for you.

She gave me some good advice: breathe and walk away. I did breathe, but I didn't walk away. I'm not one to walk away from a battle. The day must be conquered! But, the breathing did help, because I'm not sure exactly what I changed that made the difference (the alignment again? the margins? the page layout?), but the printing started to go smoothly. After two hours, I had 60 acceptable invitation cards and about 20 that are in the recycle bin. Sigh. Good thing we purchased 100 of the cards.

This morning I have family, friends, and my soon-to-be mother-in-law coming over to help put these monsters together. I hope someone is bringing mimosas. Part 2: Compilation coming soon...

The Goal

Total cost: $0 (so far)

(I am taking a moment to procrastinate grading middle schooler's concept of what a good thesis statement is...)

My fiance has little to do with the planning, and he likes it that way. He did suggest the location, he is clear on what fashion of ring he wants, and he knows that he most definitely does not want "You are my sunshine" played during the ceremony. Beyond that I have gotten very little, "This is what I want..." from him, which I suppose would be a bride's dream, right? Wrong. A wedding should be about two people, not just the one doing the planning. So, I am trying in my own way to incorporate what I know he will like into the whole shebang. We did both decide that we want to be basically a "group camp out" which happens to include a wedding ceremony. 

So, to sort out my thoughts, here are my goals for our wedding.

Goal 1: Get Married. Actually, I would say that no matter what else happens (a torrential downpour washing us out of the field by the river and under the cover of the picnic shelter or perhaps having the campground being completely taken over by hunters and their deer carcasses), no matter what, it is most important that we do indeed get married.

Goal 2: There must be cake, and it must be eaten too. Duh.

Goal 3: Guests (and us too) play games (bocce ball/boules, croquet, badminton, Scrabble, horsehoes) with a cold one in our hands (hopefully homemade apple cider, beer, and/or wine).

Goal 4: There should be lots of laughter across the picnic tables during a family-style dinner.

Goal 5: This thing shouldn't cost an arm and a leg nor should it be a burden on family members and friends who help.

Goal 6: Wait. No more goals. Five is plenty. As a teacher, I should know better than to even attempt more than three goals, because then I am spread too thin.

There! All done! Now, to take the goals and put them into action.

The Beginning

Total cost: a half tank of gas 

I am going to start by being mushy; Nathan is the love of my life. I knew this more than a few years ago, but it has taken us about five to get to the "tying the knot" stage. Both of us our wedding-shy and perhaps even a little marriage-shy. I personally love weddings. It is the ultimate party. Nathan, on the other hand, not so much...


And that brings me to May 1st, the day of the proposal. A day I was beginning to think would never come. We had been out a few times earlier in the Spring for morel hunting, and I kept thinking to myself that perhaps he would ask me now...or now....or maybe even now. Not only did we come home with empty mushroom baskets, but my ring finger was also empty--not that I cared for a ring. I cared for the question more than anything. We had already decided that we were getting married through some very casual conversations, but I wanted to be asked. I wanted to know that he was in this thing for real.

So, May 1st arrived. May Day - a day of protest, a day of Spring rites...but I told myself that I mustn't get my hopes up for morels or proposals as we headed out into the woods. We decided to go on hike up a mountain. It was a dreary day with cold drizzle and whipping winds. When we reached the top, we hung precariously on a clifftop for a timed photo of ourselves. After losing my balance, I decided it was time to go. I noticed a grotto of sorts composed of white-bark trees in front of evergreens with a bit of snow still left on the ground--a perfect photo opportunity. Nathan asked me to take of picture of him there which was strange, because he has never asked that of me before. After I took the photo, I commented that it turned out well because he smiled--another strange occurrence for him in photos.

(Oh brother, brace yourself, this next part is pretty mushy...)

Nathan said, "Since I am already on one knee, will you marry me?" I flung my arms around him with an enthusiastic yes while he murmured, "Er, I have a ring..."

And that is how this all began: with a sweet and simple proposal atop a windy mountain. I need to keep reminding myself of that feeling I had of floating on air and not let minor details cloud a beautiful day.